Medical Slang

Medical slang is the slang of doctors, nurses, and other Hospital and Medical staff. One part of medical slang is the use of technical-looking acronyms to describe patients or situations, often facetiously, to other medical professionals. Some of these acronyms are considered unacceptable these days.

Acronyms

Descriptions of symptoms

  • PFO - "probably fell over"
  • PGT - "probably got thumped"
  • UBI - "unexplained beer injury"

Other acronyms

  • CTD - "circling the drain" (expected to die soon)
  • DBI - "dirt bag index" - a number calculated from number of tattoos and missing teeth
  • FLK - "funny looking kid" (sometimes used to note mongoloidism or low-level abnormalities of appearance)
  • GLM - "good looking mum"
  • GOMER - "get out of my emergency room;" patient, usually poor or elderly, in the emergency room with a chronic, non-emergency condition. Popularized by Samuel Shem in his novel House of God
  • GPO - "good for parts only"
  • TEETH - "tried everything else, try homeopathy"
  • TTFO - "told to fuck off", instructed to go away

Slang terms

Terms for occupations

  • Captain Kangaroo - head of a paediatrics department
  • Gasser, gas passer - anaesthetist
  • Slasher - surgeon
  • Short-order chef - morgue worker

Other terms

  • Angel Lust - A death erection.
  • Crispy critter - severely burnt patient
  • Departure lounge - geriatric ward
  • Fascinoma - any interesting or amusing tumor or malignancy
  • Pumpkin positive - lacking in intelligence; implies that the patient's brain is so small that shining a torch into their mouth would cause their head to light up like a pumpkin
   

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